I was 21 years old.
I had only worked at the shelter for a month and still had no idea what the heck I was doing.
The rest of the staff had gone home for the night, leaving me to run the shelter by myself.
Harold stumbled in at 10:30 pm.
He smelled like someone had dumped a bottle of vodka on top of his head and then tried to wash off the smell by spraying him with a keg of beer.
Suffice it to say, Harold was a “little” inebriated.
Harold wanted a sandwich. And a glass of milk. And a different bed than he was assigned. And to tell me about his first car.
Then Harold started arguing with someone who was on their way to bed.
I got them separated.
Then Harold started arguing with someone else.
Then I lost my patience.
And THAT was when Harold started arguing with me!
The #1 Mistake People Make
De-escalating someone who is drunk or high is not easy.
In fact, it can be among the hardest types of conflict you handle.
There are several common mistakes people make when de-escalating people under the influence.
The most common mistake—by a wide margin—is getting impatient and rushing the situation.
It doesn’t work!
You need to accept that:
- Handling someone who is drunk or high can take MUCH longer than if they were sober.
- If you try to rush, you will likely increase the conflict (and the amount of time it takes).
I know that “be patient” doesn’t seem like a particularly huge insight, but it is boggles my mind how many people can’t do it.
Perhaps it is easy to understand, but hard to do.
If you want to learn more about de-escalating conflict with people who are drunk or high (including the two key questions to ask yourself) our next training is about that very topic!
Have a fantastic week!
Peace,
Ryan
