You only get one vote.

(To be clear, this email is not about elections). THE BAD NEWS You only get one vote for the type of WORLD you live in. Will it be kind or will it be cruel? Each of the 8,200,000,000 humans also get a vote… You only get one vote for the type of COUNTRY you live […]

What is it like to sleep in a homeless shelter?

Howdy! I was going through some old files and found these notes I jotted down on a night I slept at the homeless shelter where I was Executive Director. This was from ten or fifteen years ago, but the basic “feel” of sleeping in a homeless shelter is still pretty much the same… Have a […]

My son asked me to explain my moral code.

My son is 25 years old. He and I had a father-son dinner a few weeks ago at a small Italian restaurant. In between the calamari and the chicken parmesan he asked me to explain my moral code. As a parent, there are a few moments that matter more than others. This felt like one […]

My wife thought I would hit her.

A few weeks ago, my wife and I went for a walk while on vacation. We had one of those special conversations where you learn something new from someone you’ve known for a quarter century. My wife told me that the first time I got angry with her, she thought I would hit her. We […]

Blame the Clothes

As a college student, I did laundry as infrequently as I could get away with. Disclaimer:  I generally wore clean clothes, but that meant I frequently was down to an empty closet before I headed to the laundromat. I only remember it being a problem once. It was an unseasonably warm spring my sophomore year. […]

A few years ago, I gave up cynicism for Lent.

A few years ago, I gave up “cynicism,” “inaction,” “powerlessness” and “apathy” for Lent.  I was tired of feeling helpless in the face of what was happening to our country. I needed to do something more than just complain on social media. For 40 days I called a legislator’s office every day.  I gave my […]

Kindness ripples through the fabric of humanity.

Think about the last time you took a moment to be kind… Maybe someone dropped papers, and you helped them pick them up. Maybe you held the door for someone. Maybe you offered an encouraging word to someone who was struggling. According to research from the University of California, San Diego and Harvard, the kindness […]

Worry is not work.

If I’m not worrying about the world, who will? I take “breaks” from social media and the news. But then I feel guilty.  If I’m not worrying about the world, who will? I watch 90’s sitcoms with my wife and for an hour I forget about the plight of the most vulnerable. But then I […]

There are “levels” of kindness.

It seems to me that there should be explicit “levels” of kindness. Since I couldn’t find any I liked, I made my own: LEVEL 1 – Someone is kind to you, so you’re kind back.  Repaying kindness for kindness is easy. It is quite common.  In fact, many scholars argue convincingly that reciprocity is the […]

A tool for solving drama.

Last week’s email introduced the concept of personality disorders. You can read it here:  https://www.homelesstraining.com/people-dont-call-them-mentally-ill-they-call-them-jerks/ This week I want to share a quick tool for managing the drama created by someone suffering from a personality disorder.  It comes directly from Dr. Gregory Lester, who is this month’s webinar.  If you want to watch my interview […]

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